I check it out...
How are you doing?
I would be very interested in getting to know you if
there is interest on your part. Let me know if you would like to do so. I am
from Hawaii by the way. That is the Big Island in my picture in the green shirt.
Best to you, Jeff
Ok, that's a little creepy. How does Jeff know he'd "be very interested in getting to know" me? I mean, what if I'm like the Master Dominator and I'm looking for a little worm to lick my boots?
Well, I decide to check out his profile, thinking it couldn't possibly be a good fit.
I decide I may change my opinion (how's that for being non-decisive). Intelligent, non-stalker-y, more into quality over quantity. Likes good wine. Could be a possibility, but I've got to finish my profile...and besides, really, I still couldn't get over the fact he's contacting me with no information. So, I get back to writing. Then, an IM pops up:
close level of match, close in age no reply, it has to be the bald
head. :)
Wow. Persistent isn't he? I respond:
hahaha...actually, no, it's not the bald head. I was a little taken
aback that you sent me a message when you saw nothing else than my screen name, pic and age! that doesn't tell you a lot about me.
He replies:
that is why I would ask questions, i said I would like to get to know
you
Well, I guess he has a point. It would be the same way if we met at the grocery store, too, isn't it?
I see. well, actually, once I read your profile I found you very
interesting. You're obviously intelligent with diverse interests and a nice
smile. I'm answering questions and filling out my profile right now. I will
respond. My name is Lisa, btw.
so nice to meet you Lisa and I look forward to hearing from you.
But, who the heck knows...maybe once he reads my profile he'll say "no friggin' way." So I respond to him:
Jeff,
As promised, I am responding!You are from Hawaii? Which island? How did you
get to Dallas from there? I've only visited the Big Island once, for the Lava
Man triathlon. It isn't my favorite island - Kauai actually is. Now that I've
finally put more on my profile, let me know if you're still interested in
getting to know me. A bald head is not a deterrent, by the way. My ex was, and
Yul Brynner was one attractive man! Enjoy the snow! Lisa
He responds back, very polite and nice - we chat about Hawaii, Internet dating (I told him "To me, it's like trying to buy a cantaloupe over the Internet. You can see a picture of it, but you can't really tell what kind of cantaloupe it is - does it have a big bruise on the other side? Is it even ripe? I keep hoping that life will be like it was in college and I'll meet someone the "regular" way. But, it just doesn't happen that way anymore I guess.")
He suggests we talk on the phone. Oh, boy, here we go. I tell him that I could talk on the phone, but I don't have a whole lot of free time as I have a 6 year old and have her, well, most of the time. He replies back that he has twin 6 year old boys, so he understands and would be available to talk after they go to bed at 9pm. Wow! A kindred soul!
He leaves me his number...it's 8pm. Makena goes to sleep at 8:45, so I call him at 9:15.
Deep voice...very deep voice. It's funny talking with someone whose picture you've seen but haven't talked to...the negative of talking with someone and getting a picture of what they look like based on their voice.
First conversation is...a little awkward. A few pauses. He tells me that he's got primary custody of his two boys. Had been working as a consultant and traveling all the time, but once he got them he got a job with one of his former clients and decided to give them the stability and direction they needed. For me, that's BIG plus on his tally sheet that would more than make up for a few awkward pauses. It's obvious that Jeff doesn't have the best sense of humor. A little dry. We talk a bit about wine. He's got some impressive bottles, but maybe seems perhaps a bit...pretentious?
The second conversation - much better. He loosens up, I guess I do, too. I tell him about the Master Dominator and the polygamist...he tells me that "the polys are all over this site." He tells me that he's had 13 first dates and only one second date (he ended up dating this woman for several months).
So, he says he's "feeling it" after talking the second time. I'm kinda...meh. It's a maybe. We've made a date for March 19th. I'm sure a pretentious bottle of wine will be involved in some way.
Meanwhile...
The day after I signed up and Jeff IMed me, when I came across "the polys" and the Master Dominator, I got an message from Benny. He complimented me on not only knowing who Nina Simone is but liking her as well, was funny (plus!) with self depreciating humor (double plus!), goofy (triple plus!), and a musician (oh, no...).
Now, I've gone down the musician road before. In college I had a boyfriend who went to North Texas for music and ended up becoming a professional musician. That equals to having to do a bunch of other part-time jobs to earn enough to do what he wants some of the time.
So, no bueno, but Benny is funny and interesting (he graduated from the best music school in the country, Berklee) and quirky (he owned a vintage bowling alley in Washington and eats fried peanut butter and nanna sammiches on Elvis' birthday). We share crazy stories about weirdos we've come across. But, would I ever date him? In a word, nope. But, I'm also not just here looking to date - I need to expand my relationships in general - friends are needed, too.
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